one of my best friends in the world is about to have a baby. and we say, "Praise God. thank you for this miracle of life. great job, God." rightly so, i guess.
but when a couple of insane idiots go on a shooting rampage in Washington DC, we defend God and say, "that's evil in the world. God had nothing to do with that. He's good. and since that was very, very bad - there's no way He was involved."
it seems just a little whack. am i right?
can i safely believe that everything good that comes in life is from God? james 1:17 says so and it's easy to believe.
or does one egg just happen to meet up with one sperm to create a life. nothing Devine, just science doing its thing.
that makes complete sense to me too.
so what events are God-appointed and which ones aren't? how are we to know?
let's get to the point of it all. did God have a hand in noah dying? or was it just a freak DNA accident?
i guess i'm just wanting to know how much of this is God's fault, so i can adequately blame Him for what He was responsible for. but i'm, clearly, having a hard time reconciling it all.
my worldview is straight up getting turned on it's head.
i'm clumsily trying to find the walls in a completely pitch-black room. it's virtually impossible. kind of like making sense of God's ways.
so i surrender.
Excellent questions. I don't have any answers, and if anyone tells you they do I suggest that you shut them down!
ReplyDeleteTwo things I do know. It's possible to hold onto faith even as it morphs into something almost unrecognizable from faith as you knew it before. And God can handle your anger, even if it makes some (most?) of of his people uncomfortable. So dish it as needed and for as long as you need to. He can take it. In fact, if real faith is to survive through this hell, being completely honest about your anger, your rage, is probably necessary. I ache for you. I wish I knew a way to make it easier. I don't.
thanks, debbie. and i agree.
DeleteThere's a part in "Without Limits" (not a movie I would've ever watched if not for my husband liking it so much), and Prefontaine asks his coach something along the lines of how he makes his marriage work-- if he and his wife have the same values and all that. And he responds "I don't know. She's a mystery." Pre responds: "well, how do you get along so well?" And the coach says "I don't have to know what she believes in. I believe in her."
ReplyDeleteI've kind of adopted that as how I understand God. I don't know everything-- as much as I'd like to-- but I know enough to trust Him. Sometimes embracing the mystery is all we can do. Which is, I think, what you were getting at in the end here?
the only problem i have with these mysterious is they're so mysterious!!! (that's from caedmon's call, not me)
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